Wedding Mistakes to Avoid

There are some wedding mistakes that can absolutely be avoided because they’re under your control.

I like to be in control. This is something that I’ve learnt during my wedding planning process. There are wedding mistakes that can’t be avoided, like the weather, but there are also wedding mistakes that you can be in control of.

Your wedding is going to be one of the most exciting, magical, and stressful times of your entire life. You want everything to be perfect (what bride doesn’t?!), but it’s unlikely that everything will be perfect. On the day, half of the mistakes that happen won’t be noticed. If you’re organised enough, there are some things that won’t go wrong because you won’t let them. Let’s see what I’m talking about. 

 

Choosing The Wrong Dress

As a bride you get to pick your wedding dress. Yay! However, this can be a daunting task. There are so many BEAUTIFUL gowns out there, but what style do you want?! It’s one of the most exhausting and exciting tasks. It’ll take a long time, and it’ll be very stressful. But when you find the perfect dress, it’s all worth it.

When choosing your dress, always remember your budget and don’t feel forced to buy a dress that you know you don’t like. You have to wear it all day so you have to be happy. And you also need to be able to sit down in it….

 

Booking Without A Guest List

I’ve said this over and over again. This will be my biggest piece of wedding advice to anyone ever. You need to figure out your numbers. It doesn’t need to be specific. And you don’t suddenly have to produce a table plan before the invites have even gone out.

But if you haven’t got even a vague idea of how many guests you’re having, then don’t think about booking a wedding venue, caterers, or anything else. If you book without knowing how many guests you have, then the chances are you’ll either overspend or book something that doesn’t accommodate everyone. This is a huge wedding mistake on the wedding mistakes list. 

 

Ignoring Your Budget

You may want to get married in El Salvador and have your reception at Courtyard San Salvador. But if your budget won’t accommodate this, then it’s not possible. Similarly, you can’t spend too much on flowers, your dress, or anything else.

However, being on a budget doesn’t mean that you can’t have a beautiful wedding. It just means that you need to come up with a few ideas to cut costs without sacrificing the things you really want. DIY what you can. You don’t need an ice cream van, or a formal sit down meal. Invite less people (do you really need your aunty’s Grandma’s sister there?) and have an informal hog roast that everyone will love. 

 

Not Planning Enough Time

You’re inevitably going to be nervous on your wedding day, but, generally, it should be as relaxed as you can make it. Unfortunately, it’s pretty difficult to relax when you have to rush, because you didn’t give yourself enough time to get ready, eat, have pictures taken, or whatever else. It’s vital that you think about your wedding day schedule carefully, and make sure that you’ve allotted enough time to do everything.

 

Ignoring Your Guests

Your wedding day is all about you, but your guests are important too. If you don’t make time to speak to them and thank them for attending, then they might feel as though you don’t care. If you don’t want to greet guests after the ceremony, then make sure you make the rounds at the reception and speak to every table. You should also remember to send thank you notes to all who attended as soon as you can.

 

No wedding is ever completely perfect, but if you avoid making the mistakes mentioned above, yours could get pretty close!

Grey and Yellow Wedding Inspiration

Grey and yellow is a stunning colour combination for your wedding that could be huge in a couple of years.

Yellow isn’t the biggest wedding colour theme at the moment, however I’m guessing Spring/Summer 2019 will be its year. Slowly, we can see yellow appearing in home interiors and in clothes on the high street.

I visited the M&S website, then clicked ‘New In’. See my point?

Grey and yellow M and S jumpers, dresses, and bags

 

Things seem to come into fashion in clothing first, and then weddings later. Most brides book things a year in advance, so if yellow is ‘in’ now, it’ll take a while to start appearing in weddings. Unless you’re me and chose a colour because you loved it and then it becomes fashionable. FYI, I started it.

Yellow is such a fresh colour. People can sometimes be afraid of it, but if you pick the right shade, it can actually be very neutral or pastel. I’ve chosen a lovely lemon yellow as my wedding colour theme.

Thinking of having grey and yellow wedding scheme? Here’s some fabulous inspiration from around the web.

 

Flowers

Flowers is a fab way of incorporating yellow. You can have as much or little as you like. You could have a full yellow bouquet, or tone it down by adding plenty of white flowers or green foliage.

Yellow roses and white roses in a bouquet

Photo credit: http://www.butterflyphilosophy.com.au/2011/04/sunshine-yellow-wedding/

For my grey and yellow wedding theme, I’ve actually chosen to not have yellow flowers at all. The bridesmaids are wearing yellow, so a yellow bouquet would be too much. All my flowers are white with plenty of green foliage. The only yellow flowers I’ve got are in the church pedestals. The men’s buttonholes are also yellow as this will look so nice against the mid-grey suits.

If you’re getting married in Spring or Summer you might be able to save money on your wedding with yellow flowers. Flowers that are in season are cheaper because there’s much more of them around.

 

Cake

Harry and Meghan announced that their wedding cake is going to be lemon and elder flower. That sounds amazing! But this is also another way to add the grey and yellow colour scheme. I know lemon flavour isn’t a colour, but you see yellow when you think of it. You could also have white/grey icing with some delicate yellow sugar flowers trailing down the side.

yellow and white wedding cake

Photo Credit: Marta Locklear, https://www.instagram.com/martalocklearphoto/

Bridesmaids

If you’re brave (like me) then you can choose yellow bridesmaids dresses. I found that the yellow doesn’t actually wash people out as much as I thought. In fact, it can be a very warming colour that suits most skin tones, and hair colours.

Yellow bridesmaids with bride

Credit: Meg Baisdon

 

Confetti

This is another subtle way of incorporating yellow without it being too in your face. You can get a stunning confetti shot with this bright colour. Again, it can always be watered down by mixing ivory petals in with it.

 

Yellow wedding biodegradable confetti

Photo credit: https://www.stripeyfinds.com/

 

Table Decor

You could go crazy with yellow, and get chair covers, flowers, napkins, etc. Or choose to keep it low key by mixing with plenty of white. Use white tablecloths, and white chair covers, with only a hint of yellow on each table, maybe in a favour.

 

yellow and grey wedding theme - yellow flowers and white roses on grey tablecloth

Photo credit: https://blog.karentran.com

 

Would you consider a grey and yellow wedding?

How to Start the Wedding Planning Process

Have you just got engaged at Christmas or New Year? Here’s how to start the wedding planning process!

In a survey organised by Festive Lights, it was found that 33% of people get engaged between Christmas and New Year. I did! Which goes to show the stats must be true. This means that 33% of brides start planning their wedding during the first few months of the year. January, February, and March are then popular times to start viewing venues, looking at churches, and deciding on a date.

So, as a bride to be who is only two months from getting married, I have plenty of tips for you about how to start the wedding planning process. It’s baffling, it’s a bit of a minefield, and there are so many suppliers out there it can be confusing as to what you really want. Hopefully I’ll be able to spread some advice. Here’s what you need to do in the first few months of being engaged.

 

Start Saving

It kind of goes without saying that weddings are bloody expensive. So if your engagement was a complete surprise, you’ll most likely (like I did) have no savings or a wedding fund whatsoever. Don’t panic!

You need to discuss with your family members about budget. It’s important for you to know how much your parents and your partner’s parents will chip in. Then you can work out how much you and your partner need to save on top. You cannot start saving for a wedding if you don’t know what your estimated budget it. How can you book a £10,000 venue, if your total budget is £12,000? It’s unrealistic. I understand you might feel awkward about asking your parents if they’re planning on helping you out, but it’s normal nowadays.

 


Top Tip!

Set up a wedding account email, e.g. sarahandjaywedding@gmail.com. You can give this to all your suppliers, keeping all wedding emails in one place.

 


Book planner with highlighted dates

Sort your venue(s)

Choosing a venue sounds easy, but there are a lot of variables you have to consider:

  • How many guests you’re having (an estimate at this stage is fine)
  • Your budget
  • Your theme
  • Whether you want a church and a venue, or just a venue for the whole day
  • Location

You need to decide on all of these things before you can choose a venue. Try not to get all excited (LET’S GET MARRIED IN MARRAKESH IN THE DESERT) too quickly. What if your partner wants a family church local to where they grew up? Make decisions on all of the bullet points above, which will then narrow down the venues you can actually get married at. This will make deciding much easier.

Deciding on a venue should be done within the first couple of months of being engaged so you can book the date you want. You can have a date in mind, but don’t set your heart on it as the venue might not be able to accommodate. Especially if you’re booking with less than a year’s notice. If you’re not too fussed about a particular month, you can ask what the venue has available. This works well if you want to get married quickly.

 

Sort other important suppliers

Once you’ve booked your venue, you officially know the date of your wedding. This means it’s time to book important suppliers. The photographer and videographer are the most important. They’re usually one of the biggest expenses (after the venue and catering) and you want to spend money on them to get someone good. You don’t want to regret your wedding photos for 50 years after the day, and wish you’d paid more for better photos.

Other important suppliers include the florist, caterers, and live entertainment. You should plan to spend more on these than things like the makeup artist or cake. Though these things are equally important, they’re not where you should prioritise your money.

 

Once all of the above are clarified, confirmed and booked, you can relax for a little bit. My biggest tip is start the wedding planning process early. The time you’re engaged goes so quickly. Don’t let time run away with you. I’ve been engaged for 2 years and 2 months. I booked my venue nearly two years ago, in March 2016.

The first year of wedding planning was mainly booking suppliers and paying deposits, whereas the second year has been spent organising the smaller details: stationary, lawn games, cake design, etc. Remember to enjoy your wedding planning, no matter how long you’ve got left.

 

*Information provided in a press release from Festive Lights

The Truth about Wedding Jitters

Having slight wedding anxiety? Here’s the truth about wedding jitters and how to get past them.

I want to start this post by stating that slight wedding jitters and cold feet are NOT THE SAME THING and I have no doubts in my mind about marrying Jay. I want this to be an honest post about my experience of wedding nerves and anxiety, but don’t want anyone to think that I’m having anxiety about the person I’m marrying.

In my opinion, wedding jitters are anxiety about the wedding day itself: will anything go wrong, do all the suppliers know what they’re doing, will people like my dress, do I like my dress? Most wedding jitters are completely irrational. Of course I love my dress, I know that I do, I woudn’t have bought it otherwise. Yet something (really annoying) is in my head trying to persuade me otherwise.

This post will explain the truth about wedding jitters and why they’re okay and honestly completely normal.

 

Why you’ve got jitters

So to solve the problem you’ve got to find the root cause of your anxiety. Mine was my wedding stationary. I knew this because once I sorted it all (placecards, menus, table plan) my worries almost completely disappeared. To be getting so much anxiety over one small thing is ridiculous, but if you pile one thing on top of another, of course it’s going to get too much.

I decided to save money and make all of my stationary. My DIY invitations came in at under £100. My menus and table plan are being designed by my sister. I’m sorting my own Order of Service instead of going through a company to make them. Although this has saved us money, it’s added so much stress on myself.

 

Common Causes of Wedding Anxiety

  • Money

Weddings are expensive so it’s not surprising if at some point you panic about the budget or how much you’ve spent.

  • Family

No one has a straight forward family anymore. We’ve all got divorced family members, family members that have remarried and the straight up weird family members that no one ever sees or talks to. Just invite who you want there and don’t worry about upsetting people. It’s YOUR DAY (don’t know how many times people have said that to me since I’ve been planning).

  • Your dress

As I said before, I’m having anxiety over my dress. Partly because it’s an ex-stock dress so it’s a size 16, whereas I’m a 6-8. I’m so anxious about it because I’ve got to have about 6 inches taken off it! As long as you felt that it was ‘The One’ when you first put it over your head, you’ll still love it on your big day.

  • The weather

The UK is far too unpredictable to rely on the weather. If you’re worried about rain, do what you can to make sure it doesn’t matter. Ask the venue to provide umbrellas. Have alternative indoor entertainment as well as outdoor.

 

Bride lifting dress to reveal yellow wellington boots.

 

How to get rid of your jitters

Once you’ve discovered the source of your wedding anxiety, it’s time to sort it out.

One thing I swear by is making a list. Make a list of everything you’ve got to do in the next week, or a list of appointments in the next month. This will help you to see everything more clearly, and take one step at a time.

Discuss things with your partner. They might have some good suggestions, things that you’ve never thought of.

Finally, take some time for you. Don’t let the wedding take over your life (like I have). Sometimes you need to take a week off where you don’t have any appointments and don’t send any emails. This will give you a clear head the next time you come back to the wedding planning.

 

I panicked so much when I started getting anxious. I don’t mean just worrying about the wedding, but every time I thought about it, I didn’t want to go ahead with it. Again let me clarify, this wasn’t because I didn’t want to marry Jay. I was just getting so stressed with the wedding that it’s like my brain was telling me to give up. Every time I thought about the stupid menu or the table plan I just wanted to cry.

This feeling only lasted for around two weeks, and I’ve had no other kinds of nerves in the two years we’ve been engaged and planning the wedding. I need to be in control, and I’m having to put a lot of trust into my suppliers, so I’m struggling to let go.

The jitters do come and go, and the more organised I get and the nearer to the wedding we come, the less nervous I’m getting and excitement is starting to kick in. Remember to enjoy your planning. It is an exciting time, although it doesn’t always feel like it.

So there’s my raw truth about wedding jitters. They’re absolutely normal and nothing to worry about if they only last a few short weeks.

 

 

 

Choosing your wedding jewellery

If you’ve found this post, you might be getting married yourself and want some advice on choosing your wedding jewellery.

I know that when I’ve looked at a bride in the past, I focus on her dress and not much else, but there are so many decisions and accessories that have been thought about to complement the dress. I didn’t realise this until I became engaged myself and went to my dress fitting. Once you’ve chosen the dress, there’s then the veil and headpiece decision, the underwear decision (will the bra you’ve bought show over the top of the dress neckline?), the shoes decision (height, style, colour, material) and finally, choosing your wedding jewellery.

The decisions seem to be endless, and everything has to tie in together. The veil can’t be cream with a pure white dress. You can’t have silver crystals in your dress and rose gold crystals in your shoes. This makes finding your accessories so much harder than you thought it was going to be. This post should help you when choosing your wedding jewellery on what to go for and how to style it.

 

Bold and Beautiful

Some brides don’t want any accessories to detract from the dress, but what they don’t see is that they can accent it more. If you have a plunging or a sweetheart neckline, you can absolutely get away with a slightly bolder necklace that will fill the space below your neck perfectly.

If your dress has a low back, you can get some beautiful necklaces from somewhere like Lace and Favour that hang behind you rather than in front. Don’t forget that when you’re getting married, the back of you is what the congregation will see most!

 

Jewellery box from Lace and Favour

 

Classy and Simple

Simple jewellery always works well with a detailed dress or a plain one. Whether you’re wearing satin, lace, chiffon, and whether it’s fishtail, boho or princess, simple jewellery will set your dress off perfectly.

This beautiful set from Lace and Favour is the perfect jewellery for any shape and style of dress. It also comes in rose gold and gold if silver isn’t in your colour scheme.

 

Lace and Favour Belmont Crystal earrings and necklace set

 

Casual and Boho Wedding Jewellery

Nowadays, more and more brides are choosing to do a wedding on a tighter budget, doing a lot themselves, crafting small items and taking a more informal approach. Your wedding jewellery should demonstrate this too.

You can choose beautiful foot jewellery instead of shoes if you’re having a destination beach wedding. You can have art deco or vintage jewellery to match the boho 20s feel. Choose fun jewellery that isn’t so formal. You might go for a necklace with a coloured, statement flower on it rather than sticking to silver or gold.

 

Silver, Gold or Something else?

When it comes to choosing your wedding jewellery, you need to think about what suits other people. My bridesmaid dresses have a small jewelled silver detail on the shoulders, so it wouldn’t make sense for them to have a touch of silver, and then me to have gold.

Think about the day as a whole. What colour flowers are you having, and will gold or silver go better with those? For me, there was no option other than silver. It’s always been my favourite jewellery colour and it’s possibly the most popular.

 

It really is these little details that make a big difference on your day. Not only will you look amazing, but you’ll also feel it which is almost more important.

 

*Thank you so much to Lace and Favour for gifting me the beautiful earring and necklace set pictured above for my big day. I can’t wait to wear them!